A tour rookie, the Spaniard has one Top 10 finish and blah blah blah here are her stats. 

More importantly Curious as to what she looks like you say? Glad you asked!  You can find her image results from Google here. 

“Leave me hanging on the fist bump? How rude.”

Some of the others slated to appear in the issue include U.S. Women’s soccer star Hope Solo, Olympic speedskater Apolo Anton Ohno, Surfer Stephanie Gilmore, Indy car driver Helio Castroneves  and St. Louis Rams RB Steven Jackson. 

So basically it’s a collage of past, present and future Dancing with the Stars contestants.  No Nancy Grace?  Lame.

“And zees iz vat vee do to zee Americans at zee victory celebration tonight! Ung ung ung…yaah!”

Oh yeah and congratz to Europe for winning blah blah. Mainly just glad that we didn’t have to look at this anymore on Sunday.  Oy vey.

Big whoop.

After all, the European’s made this move in 2004 and the USGA in 2005.

But if you read some of the comments on various golf blogs, you’d think Zombie Ben Hogan were about to rise from his crypt and start whacking LPGA officials with his 2-iron.

Here’s a sampling of some of the more choice bites from various commentors:

Stuff like this causes people to not take the LPGA seriously. I will be shocked if two-thirds of the membership approve the motion. (ed note - Um actually it was, according to published reports, an easy majority in approval and players chimed in with support – more on that below)

***

On the other hand, CD, the LPGA will very likely be able to plan half a season’s worth of tournaments in San Francisco. (ed note – oh get it?  because that’s where ‘the gays’ are.  oooh funny stuff right there…you’ll be headlining the Mobile, AL Chuckles comedy club in no time!)

***

From another blog:

If the “thing” has an X and a Y chromosome, the “thing” is a dude.
If the “thing” has 2 X chromosomes, the “thing” is a chick.
The thing is a dude.

This is sickening and saddening. If this passes, then our world as we have always know and loved is will be gone and out the window.
I guess it is sad when you “belong” nowhere. (ed note – yeah, must be tough…probably as tough as any human being that would turn their life completely upside down, likely alienate friends, family and colleagues, possibly lose a career, undergo major surgery and recovery- all in the name of changing their gender.  But I’m sure your problems are big too.)

How long does your penis have to be to be considered a man? Well it won’t be long that every queer in town will be sueing someone for abuse! (ed note – Ahhhh the first outright slur – classy!)

Cristie Kerr played the voice of reason for the players - “We don’t need to comment on this because it’s a dead issue. She can compete if she can qualify. We certainly don’t want to discriminate against anybody, that’s not what the LPGA is about. And if she can qualify, she’ll be able to play. We’re like, the last sports organization to do it, it’s just we’ve never really had to look at it before.”

Amidst all of this is Mike Whan, LPGA commish who was panned by many (including us) as the pick to replace ousted Commissioner Carolyn Bivens, has since proven to be a steady, pragmatic and rationale leader.  You have to believe that under past leadership, the LPGA would have managed to turn this entire thing into a drawn-out PR debacle vs. gracefully handling it as directly as they did.

What’s left out of the mainstream media’s coverage, and what can subsequently be found on comment sections of blogs where anonymity encourages bravado by Internet trolls and closeted bigots alike, are the old stereotypes about golf.

It’s a game for old white guys who don’t like liberals, taxes and most definitely not anyone from the gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered community — aka ‘different folk’.

Most try to mask their underlying prejudices by declaring it an ‘unfair advantage’ that will ‘ruin the game!”

Really?  Ok let’s do the math.

First, there is little data on the number of transgendered individuals in the US but at least one estimate puts it between 0.25% and 1% of the population.

The last cenus tagged the US population at 307,000,000.

So that would mean anywhere between 767,000 and a little over 3 million people could be considered transgendered in the US.

OMG the LPGA is about to be overrun by drag-queens!!

Not so fast my friend.

Now if we want to be (very) generous we’ll say that 10% of the US population plays golf. If you apply that per cent to the transgendered range, now you have only between 76,700 and 300,000 people who even would fit into the broadest – transgendered golfer category.

Now let’s estimate that 75% of that group are male-to-female changes – since that is what the golf purists seem so upset about…it’s the sanctity of the sport after all (insert eye roll here).

Now you’re down to about 57,000 to 225,000 people.

Now let’s do the hard cut (no pun intended) of how many of those male-to-female, transgendered golfers are at least scratch?  Let’s go with 1% shall we?

Now you’re down to 570-2250 possible players that could have the remote chance to try and qualify for an LPGA event.  Of that possible pool of people we’ve had exactly one press the issue in the US – Lana Lawless.

A threat to the game?  Please.

And how does a scratch golfer (or low single-digit handicap) do when they face the pros?  Um, ask Jerry Rice.  It ain’t pretty folks.

So let’s call it what it is when members of the golfing community get worked up over Lana Lawless ok?  It’s just good old fashioned hate, fear and bigotry.

And now…The Kinks!

The No. 1 ranked player on the Ladies Professional Golf Association (LPGA) Tour recently announced her retirement and it barely registered. No extensive coverage on ESPN, no screaming headlines in USA Today. There was a collective yawn, as if asking, “Lorena who?”

Of course, Lorena Ochoa’s decision was revealed during the National Football League (NFL) draft, which dominates sports news. Oh yeah, and volcanic ash crippled the world’s air travel. But in any other major professional sport, the top player’s abrupt retirement would make national news. Kobe Bryant. Peyton Manning. Alex Rodriguez. Tiger Woods. All men, you say? If race car driver Danica Patrick retired in her prime you’d know about it.

To be honest, I didn’t even know Ochoa had decided to step away until our partners at Speaking of Golf, a syndicated golf talk radio program, mentioned it days later as a topic for our latest appearance. I’ve been busy and I was traveling – not paying close attention to the news. Even still, you’d think I’d catch a headline in the airport or a hotel lobby. Nope.

What does this lack of news coverage tell us? Unfortunately, no one cares. Well, maybe a few people – LPGA brass, tournament sponsors and some golf bloggers – but not many. The media gives the people what they want, and apparently it’s not women’s golf. That’s too bad because there are talented players and seemingly the potential for sponsors to reach women consumers who often control the purse strings.

Ochoa has dominated her sport for several years, winning nearly 30 times including two major championships and holding the top spot in the Rolex Rankings for three years. However, candidly I didn’t even know she was still No. 1, and supposedly I’m a golf blogger. I thought Yani Tseng was the top-ranked female professional golfer. Oops.

At only 28 years old, Ochoa’s retirement seems sudden. Hasty, even. She’s spoken of wanting to start a new life, and presumably have children – though she’s already a stepmom to three children reportedly between the ages of 7 and 14. The rationale for retirement is not entirely clear. She seems to want to follow in Annika Sorenstam’s footsteps, who recently retired in her late 30s after a decade of dominance. Only Ochoa seems insistent on retiring with her slim lead in the rankings intact, something Sorenstam did not do.

Whatever her reasons, I applaud Ochoa’s decision. She’s going out on top. Ochoa’s won the last four consecutive Player of the Year awards. She’s already wealthy, having earned nearly $15 million in career earnings alone – not to mention endorsement income. She’s accomplished nearly everything there is to achieve, although she steps away two years short of qualifying for the LPGA Hall of Fame, which requires a certain level of achievement points (a threshold Ochoa has met) and a minimum of 10 years as an active member on tour. Ochoa would have been eligible for entrance into the Hall of Fame in 2012. Perhaps she will return or the rules will be altered.

Regardless, she can do whatever she wants. The criticism is not of Ochoa and her personal interests or decisions. But, her departure is the latest indictment of the LPGA and reflects the waning interest in women’s golf. Not only are total tournaments and prize money down, but now the best player is leaving and – worse yet – sports fans have hardly noticed. Irrelevance, anyone?

The LPGA intends to expand its fan base and grow the sport, and the organization needs to increase interest from non-traditional consumers. If the world’s best golfer – a woman who is universally acclaimed for her polite interaction with fans and sponsors and for playing and winning the right way – can’t attract new people to the sport, who will? Are we to believe that, say, Christina Kim, a mid- to upper-tier player with a flair for fashion and a history of outlandish remarks, will attract new interest? Maybe. But, probably not for the golf.

Maybe the LPGA will rebound with the economy. Perhaps it will become less about the quality of the golf and more about the entertainment value. Whatever happens, Lorena Ochoa has decided she won’t be a part of it. And, unfortunately, judging from the general silence, it sounds like many fans and the media have already forgotten her.

Lorena who?

What do you think the tepid reaction to Ochoa’s departure means for the future of the LPGA Tour? Speak up – you’ll be one of the few who do.

Behold one of Kim’s tweets: Love how Dottie Pepper said I had Ochocinco syndrome. Still makes me laugh. She was the MOST outrageous and discourteous player ever to be!!

What triggered the reaction was a very positive article in the San Diego Union-Tribune that hyped Kim’s book co-authored with SI’s Alan Shipnuck.  Amidst the praise for Kim, as one of the most interesting and engaging players on the LPGA, was an (old) quote from Dottie Pepper regarding Kim’s behavior at the Solheim Cup in 2009, behavior that some say crossed a line.

Pepper wrote in a column, “I know Christina Kim loves the galleries and is a ham, but she should be a little more respectful of the game. In the NFL, she’d have been given 18 excessive celebration penalties.”

Athletes taking exception to something a journalist, analyst or any other member of the media has to say is nothing new.  What does seem odd is Kim’s inability to discern criticism from support.  One follower of Kim’s on Twitter sent the following message: Dottie might be right but then SOMEBODY’S GOT TO DO IT! Why NOT you?! <3

Whoops.  Apparently that wasn’t quite the response Kim was looking for: @rick_burgess she’s NOT right. You are ignorant for agreeing with her. I celebrated my wins AND opponents wins, ok? Jesus. Wanna be blocked?

Classy!  Take that you silly ignorant fan. Don’t you know your place now?  Thought so.

Other golf stars (or their spouses) have caught flack for blocking, or threatening to block journalists.  Fans on the other hand, even supportive and courteous ones it seems, risk the dreaded blockage if they don’t sign on wholeheartedly with Kim’s ire. 

I know, I know.  I’m opening myself up for others to say ‘you don’t know what it’s like for them…’ and ‘Dottie is a moron’.

Maybe so.

I’m no where near arrogant enough to assume that I know what it’s like for any athlete to deal with a semi-regular spotlight.  Kim I think is a bit different in that a mixture of her performance and own outgoing nature has amped up the focus on her.  A spotlight she normally seems comfortable with, as long as it’s delivering praise.

And just because – here’s a little retro Pepper love for you.

But how?  Don’t just walk around carrying your putter all night asking people to guess who you are – party FOUL!

No, you need to make it clear who your favorite golfer is by going all out.  Here are just a few examples of how you can do it.

John Daly: Sport some loudmouth golf pants, carry a diet coke, smoke a cigarette, have a cougarish date dressed as Hooters girl and a suitcase full of excuses and mistakes.

Anthony Kim: Wear a big shiny belt buckle, show up wasted, kick everyone’s ass…leave.

Rory McIlroy: Call and say you’ll be right there…then call and say you aren’t coming…then call and say you may be over but you’re not sure.  Lather…rinse…repeat.

Tiger Woods: Red shirt, black slacks, intimidating glare.  When asked how you like the party say:

“The party is setup really well for me.  Fair but still challenging.  I feel like I’ve done pretty well but I’ve missed some opportunities for hookups, so I’ll just look to capitalize on that in the next two hours and if I do that then things will be good.”

Sandra Gal, Christina Kim, Anna Grzebien: Buck naked yo!

Happy Halloween!

For all we know this could be the savior the LPGA needs.  It’s silly to be overly optimistic or pessimistic about his chances at this point.  But it’s never too early to poke fun.

To that end…we humbly submit:

The Top 5 people/things that have a higher profile than new LPGA Commissioner Mike Whan:

#5 - The Chupacabra

Claim to fame: Sucking goats dry of their blood.  Having spooky glowy eyes.

Higher profile than Whan because: Had it’s own special on MonsterQuest.

Years until Whan eclipses its stature: 5, although if Whan can capture a Chupacabra we would knock it down to 2.

#4 – Jimmy Hoffa’s resting place

Claim to fame: Being the quintessential example of what happens when you f*ck with da family!

Higher profile than Whan because: It’s a piece of prime real estate in the Florida wetlands or, where the Jets lease space from the Giants (see above photo).

Years until Whan eclipses its stature: 10, and then only if Whan never returns from a roadside diner meeting with Carolyn Bivens.

# 3 – The non-Justin Timberlake members of N’Sync

Claim to fame: Launching Justin Timberlake’s singing career and future as a golf course savior.

Higher profile than Whan because: Joey Fatone on Broadway and Lance Bass coming out? Case closed.

Years until Whan eclipses their stature: 15, unless Whan releases a solo debut album that brings sexy back to the LPGA.  Then, 3 years tops.

#2 – The Unknown Comic

Claim to fame: A Gong Show staple.

Higher profile than Whan because: Um hellooooo the freakin’ Gong Show?

Years until Whan eclipses their stature: 20, unless Whan knows how to tell a joke that doesn’t suck.

#1 – The Colonel’s Secret Recipe of 11 herbs and spices

Claim to fame: Making fowl taste so…so fine. 

Higher profile than Whan because: It’s finger lickin’ good!

Years until Whan eclipses its stature: Never…it’s impossible.  And if you don’t believe me…just watch the below clip for confirmation.

Good luck Commissioner Whan!

What I mean is this: The 180-horsepower Ford Taurus you can buy from the car dealer, no matter how much you trick it out, is nothing like the 750-horsepower machine hurtling down the track at 200 miles per hour. Sure, they have the same shape, but that’s where the similarities end.

Likewise, a championship golf course set up for a professional tournament bears little resemblence to the same course you played a few months ago.

It’s easy to sit on your sofa and criticize pro golfers on TV when they fail to make a par or miss an easy birdie putt. It’s even easier when you’ve played the course and you’ve made a par on the hole. But until you’ve played a course under tournament conditions you don’t appreciate how a course can be set up to play significantly more difficult than for regular play.

You know those media junkets where the press play the course a few days before or after a big event? We recently had the opportunity to play the Pumpkin Ridge Ghost Creek course the day after a playoff finish at the LPGA’s Safeway Classic. Whether we’re media or not is debatable, but whether we were up to the challenge is not. I wasn’t.

The day was a fun opportunity to test my game against the world’s best women (interestingly, only men played on media day), with leaderboards and corporate hospitality tents as a backdrop. But, I was humbled and learned a lot about championship course set up.

At 6,542 yards, somewhere between the Blue and Black tees, the course didn’t seem overpoweringly long. But it would probably have about a 73.0 rating and a 140 slope, which is pretty stout for us amateur desk jockeys. Still, I thought I could put together a decent round on a course that I’ve played dozens of times. I’ve shot as low as 77 here from the White tees in the past. Way to go, big shot!

What you don’t realize, though, is just how much the hole locations and thick rough affect scoring. You hear about it on TV. Johnny Miller and Nick Faldo pontificate about the speed of the greens, but it’s difficult to understand until you’ve tried it.

On a few holes at Pumpkin Ridge, particularly several of the five par 3s, the Sunday final round flags were hidden behind a bunker. Sure, you can hit it on the green, if you can get it to stop, which is tough especially when the greens are firm, double cut and rolled so they’re super fast. But now you’ve got 30 feet for birdie and you’re not going to make many of those putts.

Also, even as a spectator who saw the thick rough with my own eyes, I didn’t appreciate how penal it can be. It doesn’t look that bad, but try getting a 4-iron through it like I did at the long par-4 No. 18. The thick rough grabbed the toe of the club and my ball shot 40 yards right, landing in the middle of the lake. I wasn’t even close to the green. I made Scott Norwood look accurate.

In the end I only made par on three holes and shot a humbling 93. The best round of the tournament was a final-round 65 by the winner, M.J. Hur. That’s 28 shots better than me. Even the worst score of the week was only 83. My game was not sharp and I struggled with my swing. I would not have scored well on any course that day. However, I learned a lot about course setup and gained even more respect for the skill and focus of professional golfers.

In playing a golf course that was familiar and yet completely different, I was reminded that driving a Ford and winning the race — or hitting a Titleist and winning the tournament — are a world apart.

I recall Woody Austin riffing on a similar topic during a press conference about how the media portray Tiger Woods as ‘hating to lose’ more than anyone else.  Austin took exception to the idea that the rest of the tour pros were ok with losing.  Or simply didn’t ‘want it’ as badly as Tiger.

In some cases we’d say there’s merit to that position; Adam Scott seems to be busier doing photo shoots than fixing his game.  And in general the ‘young guns’ of the tour haven’t lived up to a great deal of their hype.  But overall, the idea that one of the LPGA’s biggest stars ’hates to lose’ is newsworthy, or merits the lead is pretty silly. 

“Hey Morgan, do you like to lose?”

“Hell no!  I hate to lose!”

“Great, thanks for the scoop!”

That’s how you spell Pulitzer my friends.

The benefit of the doubt should be given to the reporter on the headline as often they aren’t the ones who make the final decision there.  A reporter may even vehemently disagree with what is chosen as a lead.  But the piece overall, while possibly interesting to anyone who isn’t familiar with Pressel’s story, hardly breaks new ground and that is as disappointing as a weak lead.

Pressel undoubtedly has a strong competitive streak.  Though I doubt it is any stronger than say a Cristie Kerr, Suzann Pettersen or maybe even last week’s winner, M.J. Hur.

To that point, it seems like there is a different story that has yet to be told and would have made for a more interesting read. Who is M.J. Hur? Last week most of the coverage around her centered (rightfully) on her winning the Safeway Classic.  But you have to believe there is more here. 

She won with a new caddy who has only been on her bag one week.  She got into golf because of Se Ri Pak, and her father closed and sold his business so he could focus on her development.  Three years ago she barely spoke a word of English.  Now, she easily managed a press conference with media whose Korean is undoubtedly far worse than her English will ever be.

She’s at the Canadian Open this week according to the field listing on the LPGA site.  But maybe she’s tired of doing interviews, or maybe some media are simply tired of writing about Korean golfers winning yet another tournament on the LPGA.  We hope it’s the former.  While stories on Pressel, Gulbis, Creamer, Kerr and others are all well and good, barring any new, news they are also played out.  Stories on M.J. Hur or other less familiar players on the LPGA may not be as obvious on the surface, but they could be as interesting if the media who have the access also showed a desire to dig deeper than the obvious when considering story lines. 

Or, we could simply read about Natalie Gulbis being hot.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that. 

Golfweek’s Beth Ann Baldry (who regardless of what you may think of her as a writer, impressed me by possibly being the only traditional media reporter who readily was on the course viewing play) had this to say about Hur’s win and subsequent press conference.

Give a look and listen and see if you agree with Baldry’s take.

Photo & video credit: NiceBallz

Pettersen misses.  Hur makes & wins.

Hur post round press conference